This song is how my soul feels right now

...and I only have two more days till Telluride!

Watch "Eddie Vedder & Rahat Fateh Ali Khan- Long Road" on YouTube

Gratuitous Jeff Goldblum Photo

I was taking a break from school stuff tonight and went on one of those wild, unchrarted Wikipedia safaris where you start on say, celsius/farenheit conversions and end up on the biography of former N'Sync member Joey Fatone (TOTALLY a hypothetical example and not something that happened to me this past Wednesday)

Well, tonight's journey began with a studious and intelligent query about Pseudomonas infections of the lung, but was then quickly derailed and rerouted to Irresponsibletown where, after about an hour, it stopped on Jeff Goldblum. 

This isn't that weird I guess.  But what is weird, and what I realized tonight, is that a LOT of my wikipedia trips end up at Jeff Goldblum.  No matter where they start.  Anything from "starfish" to "naked boob national geographic pictures" will eventually take me to Jeff Goldblum.  He's like my internet North Star-my cybercompass always points to him. 

Anyway what Im trying to say is that I think Im probably going to marry Jeff Goldblum.  Just a heads up, so no one is surprised when they get their Save The Date in the mail.

Pauly shore should be more ashamed of himself than usual

The following is premiering on CMT in a few weeks.  I feel compelled to watch it, in the same way that I feel compelled to keep track of people I hate via social networking--it just hurts so good.  Oh and ps southern states: shit like this is exactly why our region is the defacto laughing stock of the country.

WHISKEY BUSINESS

After Nicky (Pauly Shore), the son of a New Jersey mob boss, is framed for a murder he didn't commit, he goes on the run and ends up in a small town in Tennessee where he's taken in by Trina (Tanya Tucker). At first, Nicky is as suspicious of their moonshine as they are of his fake tan, but he soon bonds with the residents to take down Gilley (John Schneider), the town's corrupt sheriff.

Its a dustin kinda night

For some reason whenever I see the movie Old School--on tv, on a shelf, wherever--I always categorize it in my mind as one of the newer comedies.  Like, a couple to a few years old.  Well BAD NEWS everyone who is in their late twenties--that shit is nearly ten years old now.  Ouch.  This reality is reinforced by the fact that if you google "Luke Wilson 2012" you'll be painfully reminded that he miraculously aged 20 years in a matter of months sometime in the mid-2000s (although i would totally still hit it. Sorry.).

Anyway none of that is the point.  The point is that OH MY GOD THAT MOVIE IS SO FUNNY.  Will Ferrell with a tranquilizer dart in his neck, Will Ferrell with a Ribbon Dancer™, Will Ferrell sliding unabashedly back into alcoholism after a single beer bong (ITS SO GOOD WHEN IT HITS YOUR LIPS).  Honorable mention--an instrumental adaptation of "Here I Go Again On My Own" serving as the constant soothing background score. 

Epic shudder time!

So today is National Women's Day or World Women's Day, something like that.  Im assuming March 8th has always been Women's Day, but it's actually getting attention this year because there have been so many confusingly anti-women scenarios playing out in current events lately.
Anyway, I thought I'd pay tribute by posting a story with sort of a weird/gross/mortifying spin.
My school offers what basically amounts to a comprehensive medical education.  Obviously you aren't going to go to a chiropractor if you are needing large amounts of bloodwork done or need your prostate examined, but we learn to do it because its important to know how these things work, if for no other reasons that to be able to speak to patients and other medical professionals about other aspects of healthcare without sounding like an idiot.
Anyway, later in the program we are all going to have to learn to do a gynecological pelvic exam and a male genitourinary/prostate exam. 
I am not excited about this at all--on the contrary the very idea make me sort of seize up with fear.  However--we are doing the exams on hired models.  Students who went to my school 20+ years ago had to practice these exams--wait for it--ON. EACH. OTHER.
So that alone sends chills up and down my spine.  But it gets worse. 
In the days when this was common practice, the male to female ratio was around 80:20.  Each student had to perform a male and female exam.  So if you do the math this means that only 25% of the men total had to be examined by a woman, while 100% of the women had to be examined by a different male classmate FOUR FUCKING TIMES.  And you know how nasty guys are.  Holy.  Shit.
So anyway, the moral is that those ladies back then were some kind of teflon-coated brave that I can't really begin to conceive of.  Bully for them.
Oh hey look, a picture of an old-timey lady doctor (pretty sure this was just concept art back then though, sorryz)!

OH HEY THANKS RUSH

"People pay for stuff they don't want to ALL THE TIME.  If you can reimburse me for the Iraq war and oil subsidies, the diaphragms are on me."       
--Jon Stewart

First of all--HOT.  God I love him right now--nothing more attractive than a man who will stand alongside the ladies.  Secondly--no shit.  How did I not think of that argument before? 

But thirdly--and most awesomely--Rush Limbaugh has totally fucked himself and every politician who shares his viewpoint (and how slutty of him AMIRITE).  They've been implying it, but now that he has come out and said it they either have to a) side with Rush "Asshat" Limbaugh and look like enormous dicks, or b) go back on their previous stance and effectively nullify the entire controversy.  Either Rush is the world's most idiotic Republican, or history's most brilliant Democrat (don't worry, I know its the former).