POUNDS

I am so excited about these two. It's going to be wonderful to have that idiot and his robot wife out of office.

overacheiver's anonymous (not me)

I went out for some drinks with my friend John tonight. In the past six months since I have seen him he has done the following:

*bought a house
*bought a Triumph motorcycle
*gotten 3 tattoos
*gotten engaged to someone

and my personal favorite,

*started an extremely successful not-for-profit organization in which he and his new fiancee read to, tutor, and hold writing workshops for underprivileged children.

Really??? REALLY???? I'm hard pressed to think of anything worthwhile that i have acheived in the past six months. Honestly, I'm pretty ok with that seeing as I can finally know where things are headed, but come on. I was actually extremely happy for him because when we first met almost two years ago he had just been handed the rawest deal ever and was barely picking up the pieces, but still. The whole thing is pretty Hansel-from-Zoolander-ish when you put it all down on paper.

big shoutout

I mostly reserve this word for my most flamboyant Tim Gunn impressions--but in addition to giving an amazing and inspiring speech, Hillary was looking absolutely fabulous at the Democratic Convention tonight.

Speaking of flamboyant homosexuals (Tim Gunn, not Hillary just in case you're on the dense side), I'm listening to She Bangs by Ricky Martin on my ipod.

you're so compact, you're pwactically my size!

I keep saying this hoping that someone will be as enthused about those commercials as I am. No one ever is.

everyone can suck it

I had an unfortunate realization at lunch today--I am not good with people. Obviously this is not exactly new news, but I realized it at a completely different level today. It started because I was in the cafeteria today at lunch time, and absolutely NO ONE in the entire place seemed capable of getting the fuck out of my way. It took me around 2 full minutes to travel a distance of 10 feet to grab a pre-made philly cheese steak, and once I finally got to the line the woman in front of me made a huge show out of counting out exact change from a bag of pennies that she pulled from her pocket. I thought I was going to lose it.

It's not that I'm bad with all people. In social situations I'm actually capable of being quite good with people. But in professional situations (you know, where it actually counts), I seem to always be around 3 nanoseconds away from strangling someone at any given time. This wouldn't be so much of a problem if I were going to stay in research and be holed up in a lab for the rest of my life, but the fact is I'm not. I am going to be interacting with and physically touching and listening to the problems of scores of people every day.

The only thing I can think of to remedy this situation is to build a reputation as a bad tempered but extremely capable colleague, and hopefully my biting-yet-witty remarks coupled with my full beard and use of a cane will help to excuse my behavior.

Oh wait, that's House. That would never ever happen in real life. I'm probably just going to have to get an attitude adjustment and quit acting like such a bratty little bitch.

I saw this picture on National Geographic today, and thought that it deserved posting somewhere.

this morning was a sad morning.

So I'm back from New York already. It went just as fast as I thought it would, but I feel like the most was made out of a short trip. On the taxi ride to the airport we took the bridge and so I was given a breathtakingly panoramic view of what I was leaving. It was only when the driver yelled at me to stop smearing his window with face oil that I realized I had been watching the retreat of the city much in the same way that Dustin Hoffman's character in The Rain Man might--my top half twisted sideways, forehead against the glass, mouth open, and the index finger of my left hand tapping in regular intervals against the bottom of the window pane. Fortunately we were in the far right lane so no one was passing and worrying about the autistic girl in the cab all by herself.

I didnt get to work today until 2:30, and I fully intend on leaving at 5 as usual. I woke up feeling kind of weird this morning--it may have been from traveling so late. Or it may be that during the course of my time in the air and on layover I ate a turkey sandwich, a large heathbar cookie, 3 bags of airplane peanuts, a bunch of gummi bears and dried apricots, a medium sized ghirardelli caramel chocolate square, a king size bag of cheddar cheese ritz bits, and a thing of honey roasted cashews. And a sprite zero. Either way, I definitely haven't been hungry yet today, even though it is well after 4 pm.

love of my life. or the next couple of weeks anyway.

I'm not really one to spend huge amounts of money on clothing and accessories, but if I had $1700 bucks lying around I would buy this thing no questions asked. It's popping up everywhere. First it was in a magazine that I read a couple of months ago. Then I saw this really rich looking woman carrying it into High Cotton. Then Miranda had it in the Sex and the City movie. It will be mine someday, even if I am 80 and it is considered a vintage item.

In other news, if I have to see my roommate's face one more time this weekend I am going to scream until I develop polyps on my vocal chords. She never leaves. Ever. You probably couldn't pry her ass off of the couch with a crowbar. And while she is on the couch you know what she does? She watches hip hop videos on MTV. Yesterday she sat there for 2 hours after work watching a Lil Wayne video marathon. I love TV and everything, but sometimes enough is enough. What I would give for my own apartment at this moment in time.