this is a long one, but it's because its about a fantastic food experience.

My friend Dina told me that since I'm not available next weekend she wanted to go to brunch for my birthday this weekend. So I agreed, under the condition that she drive, since the place was all the way out on Kiawah and around 40 minutes away.

It was the best decision I have ever made.

Just a little bit of background first--the Kiawah Island now is in no way the one of my childhood. When I was younger, Blue Cross would send one doctor and his family every year to a conference out on the island--a sort of sucky, working vacation for my dad but totally boss for everyone else. So we would drive through miles and miles of sea island roads canopied by 300-year-old live oaks and arrive at the resort excited and ready for our second-degree sunburns.

At the time the amenities included the following: a low, grey clapboard clubhouse which included a resaurant, real estate office, and a few other little stores: ice cream, souvenirs, golf wear with the resort name embroidered on the lapel, etc. Next to the clubhouse was a conference center and a pool. Then the beach. From there we would rent bikes and then drive over to our rental beachhouse. After sending my dad in first so that he could screech and convulse his way through several hundred banana spider webs, we would unload all of our crap and head straight out to the beach, where we would stay for the remainder of the week. Pretty cool.

It's a little different now. The low clapboard clubhouse has been replaced by an enormous, sprawling, multi-million dollar resort called The Sanctuary, complete with golf courses, tennis courts, a swimming area with bars, lounges, and an infinity pool looking out onto the ocean, and private beach access where attendants supply you with fresh towels, beach umbrellas, and cold bottled water. Swank.

This is where I went to brunch. Dina's boyfriend/husband maybe(?) is one of the chefs out there at a restaurant in the Sanctuary called The Jasmine Porch. When we arrived there was a spread of food the likes of which i have never seen--starting with the dessert table in the front and extending back to the hot bar, raw bar, and mimosa station in the back. When we sat down, they immediately came over and poured our mimosas after which I grabbed a plate and proceeded to eat the following in one sitting: crabcakes, smoked salmon and capers, fried green tomato eggs benedict, grand marnier pancakes, seafood penne, oysters rockefeller, fresh fruit, blueberry parfait, blue crab and goatcheese dip with crackers, tomato and mozzarella salad, smoked mussels, meatloaf and sweet potatoes, shrimp and grits and grilled salmon. Then came dessert: pineapple upside down cake, white and dark chocolate covered strawberries, tiramisu, some kind of chocolate-covered dried fruit and pistachio mumbo jumbo, and a chocolate covered chocolate cookie. After I finished I was sitting there, sipping my mimosa and on the verge of agonizing death, when Jourdan (Dina's boyfriend) brought this out:




My excitement cannot even be described.

Moral of the story: start saving money in your little piggy banks, because this shit costs around sixty bucks but the next person to come down and visit will be attending this brunch again with me.

And breaking news--Dina told me three seconds ago that there is a new grad student at MUSC and his name is Shamon. ♦