Sunday, September 14, 2008

obligatory birthday reflections

So I guess I'm in my mid-twenties now. It's not so bad. Kind of exactly like being in my early twenties. And my late teens. Which makes me wonder if I will ever actually feel like a grownup. When I asked my 83-year-old grandmother when she startd feeling like a grownup, she gave me the obligatory "Ha! I still don't know!" but then immediately followed it up with "Seriously though, it still hasn't happened for me."

Obviously I feel more adult. I officially pay all of my bills by myself (just got passed the car insurance baton last month), live in a place that my parents do not, and have a stable adult job. I even have a 401K, even though I'm still not really 100% sure what that means.

I'm not really afraid of becoming a grownup, but my worst fear is that I will someday have the paralyzingly boring adult life that I see people in all the time. Like what if I get married, and my husband is white and blond and a lawyer? What if I have a kid and have to get a minivan with a soccerball magnet over the gas tank? What if I have to join a country club because my husband likes to play golf with his colleagues and I have to sit around at the pool with a bunch of fully made up stay-at-home moms and their horrible children and talk about carpools and the hilarious perils of motherhood?

I'm not really sure how to wrap this up. It's just one of those things that I think about every time a birthday rolls around.

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