Monday, September 12, 2011

it aint about the...ch-chang ch-chang

Um actually its "ch-ching ch-ching" but i wanted to bring chang back. Im sorry if this song absolutely repulses anyone, but i love it so much.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Sunday, September 11, 2011

today

Obviously today is significant for everyone. Because while we are all reminded of the ten year anniversary of our country's worst tragedy, people are inherently self-centered.

So we will all also think about how quickly the time has gone by, how scary the quickness is, how have i done so little in ten years, i cant believe that when that happened i had yet to have [insert one of the millions of things you have done or seen or experienced since then].

I hadnt started college yet. I had never been overseas. I didnt have any tattoos. I had no idea that i would move to the west coast. I had never been heartbroken. I still had the lumina.

All of these things happened after 9/11. And without meaning to, that is how I intellectualize it all. I think of who i was before, and who i have become since.

And im grateful to have been given all of those days. None of them were owed to me, none of them were guaranteed, many were taken for granted and thats ok. I think that the biggest tribute we can make to those who are gone is to continue along to the path towards our purpose in the best ways we know how. As fearlessly and as full of intent as possible.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

$;)

Thats my elvis emoticon.
I woke up feeling very apprehensive today for some reason. Or no reason. So in honor of this being the last week of class, i completely blew off class. I filled up my tank, bought an burger king original chicken sandwich and a 32oz diet dr pepper, and hit the road.

I drove up to Larch Mountain and hiked the 5 miles to the top. When I arrived there was a cyclist and (inexplicably) his bike up there as well. We chatted for a bit, he was in town on business and had arrived a day early to bike the gorge. I was going to hang around for a while, but realized after a moment that he wanted the top to himself just as much as I did, so I left. I can always go back.

After that I just drove down the scenic highway, stopping at trails and viewpoints. I cruised at a leisurely 30 mph, and was pleased to discover that everyone in front of and behind me had the same idea. No tailgating. Just rolling down in neutral, trying to see how far you could get before you had to press on the gas again.

Finally I stopped at bridal veil overlook, an easy half mile jaunt to the edge of a cliff overlooking the gorge. And for no real reason I was reminded of a passage I had read in some Carl Sagan book a while back. He had said that when you take into account the sheer chance of a planet forming that could support life, then multiply it by the chance that that planet ever DOES form life, then intelligent life, and finally the chance of anyone one of us being selected to come into being from the great cosmic soup---there is absolutely no reason any of us should be here. Concious existence itself is the most rare and supreme privelege in the universe. I just thought of that, suddenly.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

goddamn it science

I was watching "the switch" with jason bateman and jen aniston, and it was a completely delightful movie and totally better than i thought it would be--but all i could think about for almost the entire movie was how it was nearly genetically impossible for the two of them to have had that brown-eyed child. I really dont want to be that person.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Tuesday, August 30, 2011

I was reading one of the blogs I follow this morning, and she had just posted this picture. This is sort of the embodiment of the home/life that i have fantasized about since I was a kid. I've never had a specific image until now. This is it.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Friday, August 26, 2011

the big facebook page in the sky

Ive always thought that it was way creepy when people passed away and their friends continued to write on their facebook pages. It always seemed inappropriate--or maybe not inappropriate, but like a creepy thing that digital generation kids did that sort of indicated the slipping of their collective grip on reality. Something always just felt strange.

But last night my mom's cousin Logan died very suddenly of a massive heart attack. He was part of that group of Wisconsin relatives whom I have always adored for their midwestern honesty and crassness. I definitely get my sense of humor from that side--just yesterday i posted something on my wall about almost barfing in the sink after brushing my teeth, and he and one of my other family members from that side immediately gave it a thumbs up.

But anyway--since the news of his passing, his facebook wall has been flooded with messages. Some are personal to him, wishing him well in heaven, some are condolences to the family, others are jokes for him that are just enough in poor taste to be totally appropriate for him. And it doesnt seem weird or creepy. It seems really comforting, like everyone has this place where they can go to share their memories and sadness, and to be comforted by the fact that they arent alone in their feelings, and that he was never alone in his life.

And its not cyberfeelings or people not being personal or not understanding that the loss is real--quite the opposite. Its a place where people can genuinely share what this person meant to them, even with people they have never met and may never meet. Reading all of the great, funny things that people have to say about Logan has brought me so much comfort today, and made me feel not quite as far from home.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8

Thursday, August 25, 2011

The Katy Perry Cycle of Shame

I hate katy perry. Everything about her annoys me--her outfits are stupid, her makeup and costumes are hideous, theres even something about her face that is intensely irritating to me.

But every time she comes out with a new single, this is what happens:

1. I hear the song for the first time. I recognize her voice a few seconds in, i begin listening to the lyrics. As the song progresses, my insides begin to twist with revulsion. I swear nonsensically inside my head, because i am so annoyed that i cant even yell out loud. I think about the fact that jay clifford never made it big and she did, and despair not only for the future of music, but the future of our very world.

2. A few days later, the song plays again. I shudder, roll my eyes, and switch the station to alt portland. I feel self-satisfied.

3. A few days later, the song comes on again. I notice that the chorus has a catchy tune, and listen to it. I tell myself that its just the melody, the song is still totally stupid. I linger momentarily but switch the station after the second chorus, because its still stupid.

4. The song comes on again. Im in a good mood for some reason and tolerate it. I sort of dance in my seat. The lyrics are still dumb but its so catchy!

5. Im channel surfing and run across the song. Not only do i leave it on, i crank it and sing along because i know a lot of the lyrics now. Im embarassed because i realize that i am part of the problem. I am helping to feed the monster, and am no better than katy perry herself. I reflect on the fact that we even have the same name.

6. Katy Perry drops a new single. Its so fucking stupid.
Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.8