OH HEY THANKS RUSH

"People pay for stuff they don't want to ALL THE TIME.  If you can reimburse me for the Iraq war and oil subsidies, the diaphragms are on me."       
--Jon Stewart

First of all--HOT.  God I love him right now--nothing more attractive than a man who will stand alongside the ladies.  Secondly--no shit.  How did I not think of that argument before? 

But thirdly--and most awesomely--Rush Limbaugh has totally fucked himself and every politician who shares his viewpoint (and how slutty of him AMIRITE).  They've been implying it, but now that he has come out and said it they either have to a) side with Rush "Asshat" Limbaugh and look like enormous dicks, or b) go back on their previous stance and effectively nullify the entire controversy.  Either Rush is the world's most idiotic Republican, or history's most brilliant Democrat (don't worry, I know its the former). 

How long would you last?

There's a new show on NatGeo called Doomsday Preppers, which is very obviously about groups of people whose lives revolve around preparing for the end of the world (but really, civilized society).
Of course this is a reality show because of the inherently sensationalistic theme, but honestly I don't think that the general idea that a lot of these people have is that crazy.  On the contrary, a lot of them make disturbingly compelling arguments for why they live the way they do, and more often than not im left feeling pretty vulnerable and unprepared by the end of each episode. 
Because let's face it--if the end of society came tomorrow and it was every man for himself, I would be FUCKED.  I don't have a lot of extra food stored up.  I don't have a gun or ammo in my apartment.  Shit, I don't even have a full tank of gas in my car.  I DO have a tent, a warm sleeping bag, flashlights, iodine tablets, and a buck knife, so i guess I could kick it out in the woods for a little while but let's face it, I probably would NOT last very long. 

On a lighter note, look at that screenshot of Steve Martin punking Gwenyth Paltrow HAHAHA

Heh.

I cannot stop watching this Obama Show sketch.  I think the "Joe Jamal Biden" part is what really slays.

Last Night's SNL: Cosby-ing Up the Obamas and the Return of 'Really!?!'

I was sitting exactly like this when i read this post secret

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YESSSS

You know how in Twin Peaks for most of the first episode it just feels like a mundane, over-acted show, and then suddenly kyle mclachlan falls asleep and has the dream with the dancing midget in the red room and youre like "THIS IS SUDDENLY AWESOME, I TOTALLY GET IT"?  Well, I performed my first successful cervical spine adjustment today, and that is EXACTLY what it felt like.

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up from the abyss

Its been a while.  I think because its been sort of a strange time, and everything has had a quality of unreality that i didnt want to cheapen with an attempt at a description. 

Ive been doing a bit a serious thinking over the past several months.  For years i've been in seeker mode--always on the lookout for the next best thing, pursuing the things and places that i have thought ive wanted, and working to become a version of the person i qualify as "successful" in my head.  Its been exciting and fun and painful and humbling.  And not for the faint of heart. 

But its also been a time of extreme uncertainty.  And all the while a uniting question has been sort of threaded throughout the whole experience:  is this what i really want, or is this what i WANT to want?  Its such a first world dilemma--im in the extreme minority of human beings on the planet that has been given the opportunity, however undeserved, to pursue almost ANY path in life i can imagine.  And yet somehow,  instead of a gift (which it ALWAYS is, no matter how i may feel at any given moment), many times it feels like a burden as well.  Because when i come to that multi-pronged fork in the road, what if i take the wrong one?  What if i waste it all? 

As a result of all of this over-thinking, i have sort of lapsed into a state of semi-paralysis.  I dont know if i can call it depression.  I dont feel sad.  I just dont feel anything.  No option in my path seems exciting or terrible.  No decision seems good or bad.  I dont love or hate anything.  I nothing it. 

But anyway, today the entire experience feels like it has come to a head.  I can't live like this any more--it is such a waste of time and relationships, such a pissing away of the best and most functional years of my body, such a waste of an experience.  Im not sure what the plan is, but im going to try and change things starting now.  Im also going to publish this train of thought without sleeping on it or editing.  I need to be held accountable, even if its to no one else but myself.

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songs that break my heart every damn time i listen to them

In no particular order:

Nobody's Cryin' -- Patty Griffin

Mona Lisas and Mad Hatters -- Elton John

The Blower's Daughter -- Damien Rice

The Book of Love -- Peter Gabriel

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